


Delights not me

by MiriRainbowitz



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Asexual Character, F/M, ace!Emma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-22
Updated: 2015-01-10
Packaged: 2018-03-02 19:07:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2822867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiriRainbowitz/pseuds/MiriRainbowitz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Killian Jones has probably slept with half of the girls in Boston University, and when he meets Emma Nolan, he only intends to do the same to her. However, he didn't count on Emma's secrets or the walls around her heart drawing him closer than he ever expected.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Swan

**Author's Note:**

> I felt a desperate need for some sex-repulsed ace!Emma, so i decided to start writing this. Yay!
> 
> Also, this is un-betaed, so if anyone wants to offer their services for that, I'd be very grateful.

“Excuse me, is anyone sitting here?”

Killian Jones looked up from his phone, his angry retort dying on his tongue as he saw a gorgeous blonde standing next to the seat next to him where he’d dumped his bags.

“No, love, go ahead,” he replied, reaching over and taking his bag off of the desk. The blonde smiled and said “Thank you” in a quiet voice before sitting down. 

Killian knew he should probably try to return his attention to his phone, but he couldn’t tear his gaze away from the blonde. It wasn’t even just that she was beautiful (although she was) - there was just _something_ about her that pulled him in.

Killian managed to tear his gaze away from the blonde when the professor walked into the classroom. He quickly pulled out his notebook, folder, and pencil, and waited in silence while the professor introduced himself as Dr. Hopper and welcomed them to Philosophy 1010.

Dr. Hopper started handing out syllabi, and Killian flipped through his, taking note of when the exams and papers were due and skimming through the rest of it. His perusal of the syllabus, however, was finished while Dr. Hopper was still talking about classroom conduct, and Killian took the opportunity to gaze the blonde.

“Psst,” he whispered as he leaned towards her. The blonde, however, ignored him, concentrating on her copy of the syllabus. “Lass? What’s your name?”

The blonde finally turned to look at him, and Killian was struck dumb by her vivid green eyes, and that _look_ in them (the look of someone who’s known loss). “Not telling, but it’s not ‘lass’,” she replied.

“Well, if you’re not going to tell me, I’ll just have to make up a name for you,” Killian retorted, feeling a thrill run through him at the blonde’s sass. If this was how she flirted, he couldn’t wait to see what she was like in bed.

“Do your worst,” she whispered back with a smirk. 

“Okay then… _Swan_ ,” Killian replied.

Killian had not quite expected the girl’s reaction, which was to freeze momentarily, a slightly shocked expression on her face. The shock was gone a moment later, but it took another few seconds for the girl to reply. “Why ‘swan’?” she asked.

“You remind me of one,” Killian answered. “Beautiful and elegant, but also vicious.” He lingered on the beginning of the word vicious. 

The girl’s- Swan’s- eyes lit up as she smiled slightly. “I’ll allow that,” she said. “And damn right I’m vicious. You couldn’t handle it.”

“I think I could handle it,” Killian replied, raising an eyebrow on the word handle.

“Oh no. You couldn’t,” Swan replied with a smile. When Killian opened his mouth to object, she continued. “Trust me on this one.”

Killian was about to retort when everyone started to get up and pack their stuff away, which shocked Killian a bit. He’d been so entranced with Swan that he’d failed to notice that Dr. Hopper had finished going through the syllabus and that class was now over.

Killian quickly shoved his syllabus into his folder, which he put into his bag. When he looked up, Swan was already out of her seat and walking to the door of the classroom. Killian hurried to catch up with her. 

“Swan, wait!” he called, and to his surprise, she did. When he reached her, he stuck out his hand. “I’m afraid I haven’t introduced myself. Killian Jones.”

“Nice…to meet you, Killian. I’ll see you around,” she replied with a smile, and walked off.

As she walked away, Killian took a moment to admire the way her jeans clung to her legs and ass. Oh yes, he couldn’t wait to get his Swan into bed.

 

Emma had an hour until her next class, so as soon as she left the philosophy class, she hurried to a bathroom and locked herself in the stall. Vaguely, she realized that she wasn’t having a panic attack, which had happened every other time a man had flirted with her. She wondered why that wasn’t the case this time- Killian Jones pushed _all_ of her buttons, from the way his gaze had wandered over her, practically broadcasting his intent, to the way he’d chosen to call her “Swan”, which was a nickname that only David used.

In truth, before Neal, she might have welcomed the attention he’d been paying her- he was quite handsome, with his striking sea-blue eyes, tousled black hair, reddish scruff, and that _delicious_ accent. As it was, for the past three years, she hadn’t been able to enjoy men flirting with her, but for some reason, with Killian, she didn’t _mind_ it. There was just something about him that called out to her- like he was some sort of kindred spirit, like he knew the pain she’d gone through in her life.

 _Maybe he has_ , a voice in her mind whispered. It wasn’t like she had a monopoly on pain, although being abandoned on the side of the road when she was a few hours old and spending 12 years in and out of foster homes had left quite a few scars on her. She knew she was quite lucky that David and Mary-Margaret Nolan had actually adopted her when she was 13, but she’d spent more than half of her life being neglected and abandoned.

 _Wait, am I trying to_ like _Killian Jones?_ Emma shook her head. After what happened with Neal, she couldn’t afford to let anyone into her heart- it only led to heartbreak. Besides, Killian Jones probably was only sexually interested in her, and that was just something that she was completely repulsed by. 

With that thought in mind, Emma gathered her stuff and left the bathroom, walking towards her next class. As she was walking, her phone chimed, and she pulled it out of her pocket to see that she had a text from Belle. 

_We’re going to the Rabbit Hole tonight at 8. Are you coming?_

_I’ll be there_ , texted Emma back, and put her phone in her pocket with a smile on her face. Men might break her heart, but female friends were completely awesome, and thus far, hadn’t let her down.


	2. on the mating habits of heterosexuals

Emma sipped on her beer, keeping her eyes on her roommates. Really, she probably shouldn’t have worried- Ruby was flirting with her flavor of the week, Ariel was making out with Eric in the corner, and Belle was returning from the bathroom to sit down next to Emma and sip her Long Island iced tea.

Emma knew that most people went to bars to try to pick up someone, but if Emma went, it was generally only because her friends were going. Even before she permanently accepted the fact that she was asexual, the idea had just never appealed to her. As it was, going to bars was kind of intellectually interesting- Emma sometimes felt like she was observing some of the habits of a different species.

The only problem with going to bars was that there was always one or more guys who would try to hit on her. To be fair, there really wasn’t any reason to assume that she wouldn’t welcome the attention. She was a fairly attractive woman wearing clothes that showed off her body, and she clearly wasn’t there with a significant other. It’s not like she had a sign that said that she was a sex-repulsed asexual and she only wore the clothes she did because she knew she had a great body and liked to show it off, regardless of the fact that she was not interested in being appealing to anyone.

Emma was startled out of her thoughts by the bartender placing another glass of beer in front of her and taking away her empty one. “I didn’t order-” she started to say.

“He sent it,” interrupted the bartender, tilting his head to the right, and Emma turned to see Killian Jones looking intently at her. When she met his gaze, he smirked. 

Emma stifled a groan as she rolled her eyes. Of _course_ he’d be here, and based on his behavior during class, she was probably going to be in for a long bout of him flirting with her. She considered just leaving for a second, but she was kind of enjoying herself, and she really didn’t want to walk home.

Emma saw Killian get up and start walking over towards her, so she plastered on an absolutely fake grin as he approached. “Hello, Swan,” he said when he sat down next to her. “Fancy seeing you here.”

 _If nothing else_ , Emma thought, _it'll be interesting to see how he flirts_.

 

When Killian walked into the Rabbit Hole, he was a bit surprised to see Swan sitting at the bar- and also a bit surprised at the inexplicable surge of happiness that seeing her caused. What was the deal with that, anyway?

Well, if he was being honest with himself, he kind of knew a bit what the deal was. He actually hadn’t been able to get Swan out of his thoughts, which was unusual. Sure, she was hot, but so were a lot of other girls, and he none of them had left an impression on him. Maybe it was the fact that she’d resisted him- he did love a challenge.

Or maybe it was the fact that he was just drawn to her, like a moth to a flame.

Regardless, there she was, and as Killian ordered a shot of rum (the good stuff), he contemplated what to do next. 

He should definitely get her actual name at some point, but that could wait. Should he just walk over and flirt with her? Should he send her a drink? 

Considering how that morning’s philosophy class went, the better option might be getting her a drink. When he looked at her, he saw that she was almost done with her beer. 

_Excellent_ , he thought, and ordered a beer for her. He watched as she and the bartender exchanged a few words, and when she looked at him, he smirked, which grew a bit wider when he saw her roll her eyes.

As he walked over, a forced-looking smile appeared on her face. “Hello, Swan. Fancy seeing you here,” he said as he sat down next to her.

“Yeah, fancy that,” she replied in a blisteringly dry tone, and Killian chuckled. God, but she was spirited.

“You’re welcome, by the way,” he said, gesturing to the new glass of beer. She shot him a withering look and pushed the glass away.

“I buy my own drinks,” she replied. "How do I know you didn't put something in it?"

“You should try something new, darling- it’s called _trust_ ,” Killian retorted. 

“I trust people that I _know_ ,” replied Swan. “And- I don’t know you.”

“Love, that is an easily fixable problem,” replied Killian. “I would _really enjoy_ getting to know you.”

Swan’s smile shifted into something smaller and slightly sad. “Do you mean actually getting to know me, or just have sex with me?”

Killian opened his mouth to reply, but nothing came out. 

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” replied Swan. “A bit of advice, though- if you actually did know me, you’d know that the last thing I want to do is have sex with you.”

Killian couldn’t help lift his eyebrow at the last sentence, and Swan smirked at him. “Look, why don’t you do us both a favor and go hit on someone who might actually have sex with you,” she said. 

Killian narrowed his eyes at her and replied, “Maybe I will,” he retorted. There was a chance it might make her jealous. He was about to get up when he remembered that he still didn’t know her name. “One last thing- what _is_ your name?”

“Why do you want to know?” Swan asked. “You already call me swan.”

“Yes, but it lacks a kind of _intimacy_ ,” Killian replied with a grin. “Which is something I’d prefer to have with you.”

Swan snorted. “In your dreams, Jones.” 

Killian didn’t reply, just stared at her. After a few seconds, she sighed and said, “Emma Nolan. Now shoo.”

“As the lady wishes,” said Killian as he partially dipped into a mocking bow before walking away. Internally, Killian was practically whooping- he was a step closer to getting Swan- no, Emma- to have sex with him.


	3. Dilemma

Over the years, Emma had come out to quite a few people. Most of them- David and Mary Margaret, the Storeybrooke High School GSA, Regina, Tink, Graham, and her current roommates- had taken the news well, even though she had to do a lot of explaining (except to Graham, but still). David, in particular, was actually a bit excited about it, but then again, he was extremely over-protective of her, just like she imaged he would be if she was biologically his daughter. Other people- well, okay, Neal- hadn’t taken it well at all, and decided to use it as an excuse to cheat on her and break her heart.

For the most part, though, people were loving and supportive, and now, at 12:30 am, Emma wasn’t asleep (like she should be), but was instead contemplating how Killian might react if she came out to him.

Emma groaned and punched her pillow in frustration, then rolled over. She shouldn’t even be _thinking_ about Killian Jones! He was annoying, and constantly flirted with her, and he didn’t even want to get to know her, and…

And yet, he was still strangely captivating. Sure, his behavior in the Rabbit Hole that evening was the behavior of a typical oversexed straight male, but when they were- _talking_ \- Emma had felt a delicious energy in their exchange. Not quite “heat” or “chemistry”, but- _something_. A feeling of potential.

Still, Emma knew she should stop thinking about this. At this point, she only came out to people she trusted, and as she’d said earlier, she didn’t trust him. Besides, what did it matter if he reacted the way Neal had? It wasn’t like she cared about his opinion.

_Or maybe she did_ , a quiet voice whispered in her mind as she fell asleep.

Despite only getting about five hours of sleep, Emma woke up feeling quite refreshed the next morning. Ruby was asleep in her bed, and when she peeked into Belle’s and Ariel’s room, only Belle was there. Emma remembered that Eric had told her that Ariel would be staying at his apartment last night, and Ruby had probably snuck in sometime after Emma had gone to sleep. 

Emma quickly scrambled some eggs and shoveled them down, started making coffee for Ruby, then made some toast for Belle, before going to Belle’s room and leaving the toast, a glass of water, and a couple of pills for her headache.

When Emma was finished showering, Ruby had started to wake up. After she was finished getting dressed, Ruby was in the kitchen, cradling a coffee cup in her hands.

“How late were you out last night?” asked Emma as she came in.

“Late,” Ruby grumbled. “Although I did have a lot of fun. There was this one thing Victor did with his mouth that-”

“I do not need to hear about it, Ruby,” interrupted Emma. 

“Right, sorry,” replied Ruby. “But yeah. I got in late. What about you?”

Emma snorted. “Remember I told you about the guy who flirted with me in my philosophy class? He was there last night too.”

“And you shot him down then too?” added Ruby.

“Like that duck from when David took us hunting,” replied Emma with a smirk. “I told him to go have sex with someone who might actually, y’know, _have_ sex with him.”

“Sounds like fun,” Ruby said.

“It was,” replied Emma. She considered telling Ruby about her problem last night, but before she could say anything, Belle wandered into the kitchen, munching on the toast.

“Morning,” she mumbled. “And thanks for the pills, Emma.”

“No problem,” said Emma. “Anyway, I have class in half an hour, so I’ll see you later.” With that, she walked out of the kitchen, grabbed her stuff, and left.

 

Killian knew something must be wrong with him, because his first thought when he woke up was disappointment that it was Tuesday, which meant he didn’t have philosophy today (i.e., he wouldn’t see Emma Nolan today). Why would he even _think_ something like that? He just wanted to fuck Emma, not go out with her. 

He quickly shoved that thought away and went through his morning routine, then made his way to studio. Despite what people thought, he did take his classes seriously, so even though studio was really hard, he attempted to do his best in it. 

And if he caught himself looking out the window every time he saw a flash of blond hair, well, no one else had to know.


	4. The other ace

Emma suppressed a groan when she entered the classroom and saw Killian sitting in the same seat as last class. For a second, she debated moving to another seat, but the desk she’d used had been good, so she sat down.

“Is that coffee, Swan?” Killian asked, gesturing to the cup she’d just put on the desk. 

“No,” replied Emma shortly. It was actually hot chocolate with a dash of cinnamon. Mary Margaret had introduced it to her when she first moved in with the Nolans, and it had since become her favorite type of hot beverage.

Killian was still talking. “Personally, I prefer tea, but that’s probably because of where I grew up,” he said. 

“Hmm,” replied Emma, taking a sip of her drink. She took out her binder and pencil and waited for Dr. Hopper to show up.

During the class, Killian kept up a constant stream of whispered innuendos, which Emma tried her best to tune out. Although she caught herself listening to Killian instead of Dr. Hopper once, she mentally reminded herself that David and Mary-Margaret were not paying to send her to college so that she could listen to an annoying classmate with a delicious accent. She was here to learn, not get involved with another straight guy.

When class was over, she hurried out of the room, but before she got far, she felt someone tap her on the shoulder. She turned around to see Killian.

“You know, most men would take your silence as off-putting, but I do love a challenge,” he said with a grin.

“I’m not interested in being another notch on your bedpost, Killian,” Emma replied, and stalked off. If she’d bothered to look back, she would have seen Killian standing there, his mouth slightly agape.

Unlike on Monday, Emma had a seminar on International Criminal Law right after philosophy, so she hurried towards the lecture hall. When she got there, the room was mostly full, but then she saw Graham waving at her, his bags on the seat next to him, and she walked over with a smile.

When she reached the seat, Graham stood up and pulled her into a hug. “It’s good to see you again,” he said in his lilting voice. “How was your summer?”

“Good,” replied Emma. “Ruby came and visited Storeybrooke for a week, and David took us hunting. You?”

“Visited my family for a month, came back, turned 21, and, um.. I might have met someone,” replied Graham. When Emma quirked an eyebrow, he continued. “His name’s August, he’s an English major and wants to be a writer, and he’s kind of sweet too.”

“He sounds nice,” said Emma. “When can I meet him?”

“I think we’re both free next Monday evening,” replied Graham. “Are you?”

“Yeah,” replied Emma. “Text me details.”

Emma had met Graham Humbert when she was a freshman. They shared a major (Criminal Justice), which meant that they also had a few classes together, and they hit it off almost immediately. To make things even better, when Emma went to the first PRIDE meeting, Graham had been there too, and announced that he was asexual. After that, she and Graham had been practically inseparable. 

As the lecturer walked into the room, Emma smiled as Graham leaned over and started talking. She didn’t need Killian Jones to talk to her during class- she already had another, quite pleasant Irishman to do the same thing already.

 

_Bloody hell_ , Killian thought as Emma walked away. Part of him wanted to run after Emma, to explain that he didn’t mean it like that- 

But he did, right? He just wanted to get her into bed. Apologizing to her would mean that he _cared_ about her, and he didn’t. 

He _didn’t_. He couldn’t. So far, caring about people had just left him with a broken heart.

Part of him said that he should just take Emma’s advice and find someone else- someone who wouldn’t worm their way into his heart and then break it, but on the other hand- he did love a challenge, and if Emma Nolan was anything, she was certainly a challenge.

As he walked away, Killian pondered his situation with Emma. She had told him her name the other night, but this morning she’d acted completely indifferent towards him, and now she appeared to be angry with him. So, one step forward, but then two steps back.

So far, this was proving to be a very interesting chase.


End file.
